Week one of half ironman training down in the books. If it is one thing that I have learned through my many many years of training *cough*half hearted as it may have been *cough* is that flexibility and the ability to move on are key.
Due to illness I missed ALL of my runs during the week and had to cut my 9 miler today to an easy 5K. Meh. There is always next week. And there really will be next week. See look on the calendar, it is right there.
Funny thing is - this whole being able to move on when I miss a workout is new to me. I usually try to cram it in on a rest day or do three workouts one day to make up for it. No more.
19 weeks until my first half ironman and I realize that it is for real. I am really for realzy going to do this. I am nervous, yes of course, but in a good way this time. FINALLY. I am not worried about cut-off times and finishing last. I am not even worried about finishing. Something clicked and I know that I will succeed. I have the drive and the ambition to make it happen.
I really think that what clicked was my desire to work for this. Not only do I want this, I want to work for it. I want to enjoy this because this is a major first for me and possibly one of the last major firsts as I do not intend on doing an Ironman any time soon.
You see, the reason that this means so much to me is that I messed up enjoying my first marathon in a BIG way. And sadly I realize that I will never have another first marathon to enjoy now. No matter how many races I run in my lifetime I will never truly have the experience of a first marathon ever again. I blew it on a DNF (did not finish) race. And I am so pissed to this day that I messed up and did not respect the race like I should have.
I want to really work for this goal and feel it in every thing that I do. My first triathlon was an awesome experience but every triathlon aftwards was just another triathlon. The excitement and uncertainty of the first one was gone. That was not a bad thing per sey, as the excitement turned from just finishing to placing in my division to ultimately winning my division in the final race of my first season. However once your first is done, it is done.
You know, this applies to so much more than just sports. We need to get back to working for things. We want change, but we don't want to work for it. There always is an excuse, and sorry to be blunt but I am sick of hearing them. Not everything that is wrong in our lives is caused by the carelessness of another. Not everything is negative. Nothing is unrecoverable, you just need to look for that recovery plan and put it into action yourself.
It is our own choices that lead us down the road. We can only take ownership of our choices and life, and that means that we must respect the choices that others make. It does not mean that we have to like those choices, but we must respect them and then move on at the end of the day.
So I am not going to waste this training. I have a lot of work ahead of me, but I have time. I have patience. I have respect for this sport, my friends, and the work ahead of me. I have seen what will happen if I loose sight of this and start to slack off.
The best thing about failing at my first marathon is that I have seen the bad. I want something different this time. Isn't that all we really can do? Learn from our mistakes?
Remember - you only can have one first of anything. Make it count.